Christmas

I don't feel like celebrating this year. I don't want to put a tree up or put up decorations. I am not in the holiday spirit. I feel bad because I feel like I'm not doing things that you are supposed to do. I feel like I should put aside my feelings and just go along with everything, but I just can't. This time of year just makes me feel sad and it's hard to pretend to be happy. So I'll buy presents, I do like to get gifts for our parents, grandma and the little ones, and I'll bake - that's relaxing and I definitely need relaxation, but I'm looking forward to January and hopefully some good news.